speak now

“Real life is a funny thing you know. In real life saying the right thing, at the right moment is beyond crucial. So crucial in fact, that most of us start to hesitate, for fear of saying the wrong thing at the wrong time. But lately what I’ve began to fear more than that, is letting the moment pass with saying anything.
I think you deserved to look back on your life without this chorus of resounding voices saying, I could of but it’s too late now. So there’s a time for silent, and there a time for waiting your turn. But if you know how you feel, and you so clearly know what you need to say. You’ll know it. I don’t think you should wait.
I think you should speak now.”

- Taylor Swift

for the first time in my entire life

my definition of "Fearless" had been achieved

a borderline tell-all handwritten letter had been given

writing it was easy, it finally made me feel like i was speaking my mind.

giving it away was scary, the 3 seconds it took me to scribble a name in green sharpie on the front of the envelope was the scariest.

but the scariest and most exhilarating feeling was that the person it was meant for read it.

for the first time i wrote someone who meant something to me a letter

and it wasn't crumpled up and thrown in the back of my closet

or folded neatly and placed into a shoe box.

for me, the hardest lesson i've learned over this last year

is to never let a chance pass you to tell someone how much they mean to you

no matter how much it scares you

or no matter what they might say or do

tell them.

of course the dreaded fear of...

what will they say back?

will they say anything at all?

more often than not you will regret the things you didn't say to someone instead of the things you did.

eventually, one way or another it will come down to you saying...

"I could have told them...but now it's too late."

for the first time i did just that.

and maybe it didn't end the way i always exactly pictured something like that ending.

it could have been better

but it could have also been much much worse.

no matter the outcome

i don't regret it

and i know i would have regret saying nothing at all

so as Taylor Swift as said....

"...if you know how you feel, and you so clearly know what you need to say. You’ll know it. I don’t think you should wait. I think you should speak now.”